World is as big as you see it, as small as you see it

Hmmm, whenever you do not want to find that something, that something or somebody will always pop up in front of you. Or should I say that my antenna is very sensitive? Why is it that I always will bump into her somewhere.. somemore, we are complete strangers. That is a comedy.

At times like this, when we quarrel with each other, negative thoughts of me leaving him will always set in. I know that to some extent, I am selfish. I am unwilling to let go of protecting myself, unwilling to let him take care of me as I cant feel that he has the capabilities to take care of me, to love me unconditionally. Seems like everything is all about me and me and me. I dont like to quarrel with him. He does not understand that during quarrels, leaving me some space will make me miss him, make me think about him, make me think though of what has happened. In relationship, I have just simply isolated any problems and never solving it truly. hmmm.... Probably I've grown tired of problem solving? Everytime I am unhappy, I'll talk to or look for someone else who will not make me unhappy and this is unhealthy as this is known as running away from reality. Karen commented yesterday that I am an idealist. I think of everything in life as so wonderful, so ideal. However, isnt life so?-----IF you work hard for it. Probably life is like what she hinted, to be so harsh most of the time. Sad. I miss Timothy's jokes as he always will say it with so much enthusiasism that when I always laugh at the corny joke, most of the time it is because of the way he says it. Hopefully he does not face the same problem as I face.

Coincidentally, we are both watching the same Taiwanese Drama Series and he commented that his personality seems to be similar to that guy and they are facing the same problem. Well, I dont feel so leh. Firstly, Ethan's MINE!!!! haha Ethan's the male main actor. He is so soo SOOOOoo good looking that I like it, especially the way he sleeps, looks like baby eh. And well, Ethan has a lot a lot of compassionate and passion for his love, unlike that Timothy. Hai, to think that he actually told his wife that their marriage is a mistake. I was like, " WHAT?!?! You actually said that?!?!?!?!" Aiyo, I mean ur wife leh, how could he say that to her. If my hubby say that to me, I will be so upset that I will go for divorce settlement the next day. Hai... Some people just dont appreciate people around them.

The next BIG thing on my head is my business. Scratch head leh. Business is in bad shape. I need to use brain to think more so that I can make business work. I need more networking and meet more people. Now so looking forward to the trip to Phuket lah. Phuket, HEre I Come!!!!!

P.S. Hopefully someday, my prince will come and whisk me away to places that I want to visit and make me the happiest princess in the world. I wish...